“Children survive without cousin relationships. “Sil and her precious views or building an honest and open relationship with your child.” “ NTA I guarantee lying to your child about their origins will cause a divide in that relationship.” “Op ought to cut contact for the sake of their child.” ~ daemin “And even in the unlikely event that she did, she won’t do so in front of her child, who will pick up on that attitude and act on it towards Op’s child.” ![]() “There is no f*cking way she’s going to bite her tongue when the child, who is the living representative of this thing she unreasonably hates, is in front of her.” “This woman has acted insane over something that’s not her business for years.” “Do your son a favor and spare him of that and the likely possibility that if he does make friends with cousin, it’ll be ripped away later when SIL starts in with some other new wild demand.” ~ Sad_Appearance4733 “You better believe she’s going to make some hateful or belittling comment to your son in the future if she feels this strongly.” “The extended family can eat rocks if they think this is a solution.” “Your child should come first, and if he later finds out his origins were some dirty little secret, he’s going to feel like he’s a dirty little secret. Some pointed out where the priorities should be. Having explained the situation, OP turned to Reddit for judgment. “My brother just wants the tension to stop and ‘isn’t going to fight with her anymore.”‘ My parents are calling me as much as I’ll answer to beg me to consider.” “My wife is adamant that we shouldn’t but wants our son to have a cousin. “This isn’t some shameful secret that we should be ashamed of.” “Our parents think we should do this because she ‘has a point’ and they were ‘always uneasy with it’. “She’s agreed to a compromise that she’s willing to do holidays and family outings as long as we never tell the children that our son is from a surrogate.” “My parents want the whole family together again.” Years later, she’s softened to have our parents around without us at least.” ![]() “She refused to bring the baby over for holidays or to meet her cousin because she refused to have her daughter ‘raised to view women as objects’. “They had a daughter, and it only intensified her views.” “We were willing to put it all behind us.” “Our parents were thrilled, and so were we.” ![]() “A few months later, my brother and his wife announced a spontaneous pregnancy (after more than five years of trying).” “My brother apologized for her but said he couldn’t change her mind.” “She refused to go to our baby shower or see us in the hospital, but she did send a ‘new mom kit’ meant for our surrogate with things to help a pregnant person recover from childbirth.” “She spent months blasting all of us about how horrible we all were, that we supported all sorts of terrible practices because we were doing this, etc.” “We found a friend who was willing, and we now have a son.” “His wife is as against the concept of surrogacy as it’s possible to be and always has been.” “Our parents are old-fashioned, but they tried to be happy for us. “My wife and I eventually decided to start working with a surrogate.” “My parents always wanted grandchildren, and both my brother and I wanted children, but both of us ended up facing fertility issues with our respective partners.” ![]() “AITA for not wanting to lie to my son for the sake of family harmony?” That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) polpoper when he came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment. What happens, though, when a relative decides that your child doesn’t fit the definition they use? There are as many ways to define family as there are families. Family means different things to different people.įriends, relatives, the guys in your frat.
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